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,"They're only six-year-olds. How much trouble can they be?"

-- John Kimble (Arnold Schwarzenegger)

Kindergarten Cop is a weird film. Here we have Arnold Schwarzenegger -- a former bodybuilder, famous for single-handedly taking out half of the human race in every possible violent manner-- and a group of six year olds, in what is dubbed a "Comedy Thriller". Surely this seems like a bit of a contradiction -- who, for example, is the target audience supposed to be? It couldn't be the warm and friendly family of four, considering the number of violent scenes in the film (such as, a man setting the school on fire, small children being kidnapped and terrorized, and people getting shot and beaten). Neither could it be Arnie's die hard fanbase, who fell in love with his various methods of human destruction, and now have to be subjected to his warm and friendly schoolteacher side as he soaks up the limelight.

Kindergarten Cop's audience lies somewhere in the middle, I think, and (somehow) the whole film comes across as pretty entertaining. Buoyed by Arnie's charm, and the chemistry he has with a group of six year olds (who'd have ever thought that?), this feels like a feel-good fantasy. The heart warming scenes and comedy value take priority over the odd, violent moments, and Schwarzenegger shows that he has a knack for doing the more "soft centred" roles -- though, only with close supervision from his director. Ivan Reitman previously worked with the Austrian on Twins, and, despite its success, it was a very bland and forgettable experience for the viewer. Reitman does a great job this time, however, at contrasting Arnie's unique charm with the random misbehavings of the children.

As far as the story goes, Schwarzenegger is Detective John Kimble, and has been pursuing drug dealer Cullen Crisp (Richard Tyson) for a number of years. Accompanied by Detective Phoebe O'Hara (Pamela Reed), he's soon ordered to travel to Astoria, as intelligence believes Crisp's ex-wife may have $3 million of his drug earnings stashed away. This is Kimble's chance to convict the criminal once and for all; what he didn't plan on, however, was O'Hara suddenly becoming ill and having to fill in her role as the undercover kindergarten teacher at the school where Crisp's ex works.

At times, the film is genuinely funny and engaging; though at other times, you're left wondering why exactly this mesh of violence with family ties was marketed in such an inappropriate fashion. Die-hard Arnie fans and concerning parents may turn their noses up at this film, but if you're somewhere in the middle, you'll probably find Kindergarten Cop quite enjoyable. It's definitely the best of the "Schwarzenegger Comedies" -- though with Junior and Twins, I guess that's not really saying much, is it?

(C) Andy Carrington, 2009.